The Photos of Us

This is the last time I go through these photos
Before I delete them all from my phone
From the first selfie we took outside that bar
To the last weekend we spent at your home

Here’s one we took together on the bus
As we traveled five hours to France
You had to make me come to your house
To ask your parents’ permission to take you out

And these memories
I’ll take with me
For the rest of my life
They may be erased
From my phone
But they’ll remain with me forever

This one’s from the time we woke up late
And traveled to the beach for the day
We didn’t know it was going to be a nude beach
After an hour we had enough, we had to leave

So we hiked along the cliffs to somewhere new
Made love in a field with incredible views
We stopped at a beach to watch the sunset
I knew this would be a day I would never forget

And these memories
I’ll take with me
For the rest of my life
They may be erased
From my phone
But they’ll remain with me forever

My finger hovers over the button to delete it all
But my heart is stinging as my stomach falls
I don’t think I have the strength in me to forget you
My finger’s shaking, mind’s racing, I can’t forget you

But I finally submit, giving in to the pain
I erased it all, including your name
Now I feel an emptiness inside my chest
An emptiness I know I will never forget

*First published by trashheap in July 2020.
Link to poem: https://trashheap.party/issues/TR2SH/photos_of_us/

Quarantined

I’m quarantined inside my room
The country shut down because of a flu
We can only leave our homes to go buy food
And for some reason I’m only thinking of you

I have big problems that are very grave
But my mind chooses to be in another place
I’m wondering if you’re watching a movie feeding
Popcorn to another face

Sitting in my bed during a quarantine
A virus broke out and infected the world
The country shut down almost everything
And my only thoughts are of a girl

Meanwhile no one can go out in the streets
The police will stop you to pay a fee
I just need to buy some toilet paper
But really I need to walk to forget her

I’m quarantined inside my home
I still have two more weeks to go
Two more weeks of feeling alone
Fighting the urge to call your phone

*First published by trashheap in July 2020.
Link to poem: https://trashheap.party/issues/TR2SH/quarantined/

Boardwalk Stars

I want to spend my last night,
underneath these boardwalk stars,
as our parents try to call,
wondering where we are.
Let’s cruise this Jersey line
one last night,
and hope that somehow
it brings back the time.

I want to sit on the beach
and gaze at the horizon,
watch the sunset,
hit the sea—
like a million diamonds
as far as the eye can see.

I want to dance as the band,
plays their songs
on the stage underneath
these boardwalk stars,
holding your hand
as the night goes on—
with the feeling nothing can go wrong
tonight.

So let’s spend our last night
on all these rides.
Sit on the beach,
and wait for the tide
to reach our feet and say goodbye—
holding you and staring into your eyes
all night long.

Let’s forget life
just for a second,
tonight.
So we can enjoy these boardwalk stars;
just for tonight,
we’ll remember who we are.

One last chance,
one last time—
run to the edge of the line.

Let’s do it for real this time:
cross it,
never look back—
leave it all behind.

We’ll cruise this Jersey line
one last night,
and we’ll run to the edge of the line.

But until then,
let’s enjoy,
and never forget:
all of these boardwalk stars.

*First published by Ink & Sword Literary Magazine in February 2019.
Link to poem: https://go.epublish4me.com/ebook/html/10099511#page/26

My Greatest Fear

You asked me why
Why I didn’t want to date you
I told you why
I didn’t want to lose you
I’d rather talk to you forever than one to two years
And never hear from you again—
That’s my greatest fear.

You said
We got this
I’ll be there until the end
But little did you know
That’s what the last one said.

However
I never learn—
So we dive in.

It’s a year down the road
Now you’re not even my friend.

*First published by The Kraken’s Spire Literary Magazine in November 2019.
Link to poem: https://www.yumpu.com/en/document/read/62940908/the-krakens-spire-literary-magazine-volume-1